FanPost

First Annual All Headcase Team!

Hey doodsters, I am putting together my "All Headcase Team" and I need a widdle bit of help. I know who my QB, RB, DE and WR are, but I need some suggestions and help with the rest of my team...

 

Here's what I've got so far:

Owner - Al Davis

GM - Joe Thomas

Head Coach - Barry Switzer

QB - Ryan Leaf - Went psycho on reporter, indicted on burglary/controlled substance charges
QB - Ben Roethlisberger - Addicted to cheeseburgers and raping young women.
RB - Lawrence Phillips - Driving a car into 3 teenagers, choked GF unconcious, serving 31 yrs
RB - O.J. Simpson - Found not guilty of murder, "If I did it" book, later: Las Vegas robbery/kidnapping, serving 33yrs
WR - Rae Curruth - Fugitive found in trunk of a car, convicted of conspiracy to murder his pregnant girlfriend
WR - Plaxico Burris - Domestic disturbances, civil lawsuits, shot self in leg at nightclub, serving time in prison
WR - Chris Henry - Aggrivated assault w/ firearm, drug/alcohol incidents, domestic dispute: fell out of truck and died
WR - Michael Irvin - Raging coke head, stabbed teammate in the neck with scissors over a haircut
G - Conrad Dobler - Dirtiest player in NFL history, kicked, punched spit on opponents
G -
C - Barret Robbins - Went missing week of SB, Bipolar, shot 3 times during a brawl with police
OT - Kyle Turley - Threatened to kill Mike Martz
OT - Kenyatta Jones - Poured boiling water on a teammate, arrested for urinating on a dance floor, assaulted officer
TE - Jerramy Stevens - Assaulted 17yo, arrested for sexual assault, crashed into a nursing home
DE - Alonzo Spellman -
DE - Charles Haley - Urinating on cars, masturbating in locker room
DT - Tank Johnson -
DT -
LB - Brian Bosworth
LB - Bill Romanowski - Seems like the epitome of a 'roid rager, spit in Stokes face, punched teamate in eye
LB - Lawrence Taylor - Sent prostitutes to opposing players to distract them, raging coke head
LB -
FS - Dwight Smith
SS -
CB - Pacman Jones
CB -
K - Sebastian Janikowski - E-tard, numerous run-ins with the law
P - Todd Sauerbrun - What does a punter need 'roids for?

In case you might be thinking "OMGsh, what the fudge is 'All Headcase Team'?"

Answer: It's the nuttiest stooges in NFL history's All-Star squadron of crack headz and weirdoz. Like a bunch of wild goons who were the craziest [zite decorum] holes at their position. Help me out by throwing in your suggestions. I want to see a [zite decorom]ing bad ass line up of murderers, theives, crack fiends, masturbaters (Haley), idiots and downright insane criminal thuggish ruggish bone heads ever. Even retired players who've gone psycho count!

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Niners Nation's writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of Niners Nation's writers or editors.