This is part one of... well, I assume it will be thirty-one posts in a little section I'm going to call "At Least We're Not..." in which I look at the negatives of another team in the league and we can all take a collective deep breath and say "Well... at least we're not them!" Of course, this is also because there's not a whole lot going on in the offseason and probably a good, satirical way to pass the time. I may take a turn for the offensive if I see fit, so if I say something and a fan of said team reads it, note that, while I probably dislike your team, there's not a fanbase out there of whom I really want to insult. Unless you're a dirty, smelly Raiders fan. Just kidding... maybe.
Anyway, how about we get a fresh start after the jump and I get started on our look at why we should be so glad we're not fans of the Arizona Cardinals, who are conveniently the first team I'm looking at alphabetically and also a divisional rival, of which we can find many ways to vent our.. malice? Make the jump.
Hey Larry... you mad, dawg?
The Arizona Cardinals. As far as I'm concerned, the name should be spat out with much contempt as possible. Or at least, that's what the NFL would like us to do. They're really banking on a 49ers-Cardinals rivalry. I wish the Rams were good instead though, Rams-49ers has been a great one over the years. But with the Twitter trash talk, and the forced Monday Night Football games which have actually turned out rather exciting... well, I'm kind of embracing it.
It's nice to have someone to fight with, and right now, the Cardinals are that. But to the point of this article. The casual observer may read this and say "Uh, hey, Ninnyjamjimbothing... the Cardinals have went to the playoffs the last couple years while the 49ers sat at home watching them." I know. I get you. We're on the same page, my man.
But you've got to think the Cardinals expended their one true run when they went to the Super Bowl. They were quarterbacked by Kurt Warner, they had this electrifying offense with key playmakers on both sides of the ball. They came up just short against one of the most dominating teams in the league and there's no shame in that... Well there is a little bit of shame in that. That pick-six was absolutely hilarious. No seriously, I was rooting for the Cards in that game (NFC West represent, dig?) but man that was priceless. It's all about momentum. I'm a firm believer in the belief (believer in the belief... good one ninnyjambo) that momentum plays a huge part in how a team performs, and nobody can deny that the 49ers have momentum going for them. There's a reason most everyone is picking the 49ers as the team to win the division.
The Cardinals also have many question marks on their team. Where do the 49ers have "holes"? At cornerback? Maybe at right tackle? I think Alex Smith has already shown he's been good enough to at least be serviceable and win some games, but what has Matt Leinart shown? In playing time, we have shown we have the better quarterback. And now, it's looking like we have more weapons than them on the offensive side of the game. They have Fitzgerald and then Beanie Wells, and not much else with 'Q' gone. Breaston should be an above-average number two, but I think with Crabtree, Davis, and an improved Frank Gore with the addition of Iupati and Anthony Davis.. I have to think we are at least on par with our offensively gifted rivals.
This piece was a test run, I'll be working on insulting other teams a bit more extensively as I put these out, but I wanted to get this one up in time. People look at Dashon Goldson and Manny Lawson coming up soon, and Andy Lee being upset about his contract and they kind of wonder whats going to happen. I don't think there's anything at all that could indicate that the 49ers will suffer the same kind of collapse of sorts that the Cardinals had this offseason. The team lost a lot of key players, they did a very servicable job of trying to patch these holes, but we won't know if the tape will hold or peel away.
Plus the 49ers red >>>>> Cardinals red. Biting our style and can't quite pull it off.
In Summation: At least we have a quarterback who has proven he can play in his most recent playing time. At least we have every contributor in place from last year returning and ready to play. At least we don't have a terrible red color representing us. At least we didn't just lose a Super Bowl and have everyone jump ship. At least we've won five of them... I imagine I'll use that one a lot. At least we can say we are on par offensively with everyone in the division, and on the top when it comes to the defense. At least, my friends, we are NOT the Arizona Cardinals.