After careful study and consideration, I finally feel I have enough knowledge of this year's Draft Class to mock this thing.
So let's do this!
AP--Osweiler waves to the crowd while holding a parasol after being named Homecoming King.
Round 1 -- Brock Osweiler, QB, Arizona State
The 49ers, not satisfied w/Alex Smith or CK's development, they shock everyone and take a flyer on the talented, athletic, yet VERY RAW Osweiler. I don't know about this one, but I feel it's the move Harbaalke will ultimately make.
Round 2 -- Kirk Cousins, QB, Michigan State
Osweiler's very raw, so w/Kirk Cousins still on the board, the 49ers make the obvious selection. Nowhere close to Osweiler's potential upside, but he's the poor man's and the 2012 Draft's version of Andy Dalton. Very solid pick here, I'm a big fan of Kirk Cousins.
Round 3 -- Brandon Weedon, QB, Oklahoma State
Just like Cousins in Round 2, the 49ers pull the trigger on the BPA when Weedon's age causes him to freefall into the 3rd Round. Harbaugh likes his QBs to be like SS's, and hey, a AA starting pitcher w/a 5+ ERA is close enough. I have my doubts about this pick though... It's not the age, just not sure if I trust a "ginger-headed" QB.
Round 4 -- Ryan Lindley, QB, San Diego State
A real surprise pick here after taking QBs in the first 3 rounds... To everyone but me, that is. Lindley's a great prospect, but was very inconsistent in college. And I think that inconsistency, it's going to remind Harbaugh and Baalke of Alex Smith. And they like Alex so... I'm sure you can all connect the dots from here. Plus, as a QB at SDSU, Harbs has to figure that the kid's got worlds of experience reading the greens down at Torrey Pines. And if Alex is gone after the 2012 season, Jimbo's gonna need a new caddy so this one's kinda' a "no brainer" in Round 4.
Round 5 (a) -- Kellen Moore, QB, Boise State
The 49ers take no chances and trade up (N.Bowman plus a 2nd Rounder in 2013 to the Colts) to get the 1st pick in Round 5. Baalke gets his coveted QB in left-hander Kellen Moore. I love this pick, I love this trade! Great value... Moore either gets stronger and develops into the next Drew Brees, or he retains his Ken Dorsey skillset, retires in a year and takes over immediately for Mark Roman. It's "win-win" and a great, great move by Harbaalke.
Round 5 (b) -- Case Keenum, QB, Houston
I don't like this pick myself, but it makes perfect sense. Harbaugh loves balance in his offense, and Keenum PERFECTLY complements the Kellen Moore selection. Balance... Keenum is the undersized RIGHT-handed QB w/the outstanding college career, while Moore's the undersized LEFT-handed QB with the outstanding college career. Balance... Sure, the 49ers still have a few other needs, but for those really PAYING ATTENTION, this pick really ain't that hard to predict... Balance.
Round 6 -- Aaron Corp, QB, Richmond
The 49ers take a flyer on Corp in the 6th and it makes sense. Sure, he's mobile and smart and kinda' the same type of player that Harbs was, but that's not it. They both simply share the most important trait that Harbaugh looks for in his signal-callers: an unbridled HATRED and loathing of Pete Carroll. By giving the job to Barkley and denying Corp the chance to be the USC starting QB, Carroll f***ed Corp outa' getting more USC co-ed tail than one mediocre-looking single young man could ever possible dream of getting otherwise. Instead of USC 9's and 10's, Corp was banished to the Kentucky-fried-world of Richmond 4's, 5's and 6's... It's even possible that Corp hates Carroll more than Harbaugh, perhaps even more than Taylor Mays... I don't really know if I like the pick or not, we DO have some other roster needs that need addressing, but if you don't see this as the obvious selection here in Round 6, well you just don't know football.
Round 7 -- Chandler Harnish, QB, Northern Illinois
Now, I'm going to come clean and just say that I've got inside knowledge on this one. My extensive football knowledge, my pedigree as a past Heisman Trophy Winner, my 31-combined years as a starting QB and HC in the NFL, and my close personal friendship w/Jim Harbaugh, all these things give me insight on this pick that you guys just won't have... I'll give you a "pass" on this one. Harbs has got this little restaurant -- not going to say which one -- that we always go to the night before the last day of the Draft. And Harbs' favorite dish is, you guessed it, Cornish GameHen. Dude is just f***in' bananas for Cornish GameHen, you've no idea... So with Chandler Harnish on the board in Round 7, and Harbs w/a belly full of Cornish GameHen, this pick is automatic. I don't even know if Jim knows who this guy is, but when someone mention's this guy's name and Jimbo hear's the alliteration and starts thinking of last night's dinner, his mouth watering as he recalls that succulent little gamebird, well ol' Baalke won't have a chance to say no... So it's gonna be Cornish GameHen - a.k.a. - Chandler Harnish in Round 7.
So that's it... 8 picks, 8 QBs. Sure it's unorthodox. Sure we've got some other needs. But like I always say, nothing's more important than your trigger man. And hell, after last year's great draft and dream season, I'm putting my faith in Trent and Jim. I'm sticking by that even if they do something crazy and only draft like, say, 5 quarterbacks...
This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Niners Nation's writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of Niners Nation's writers or editors.