Happy game week 49ers faithful! Now that our stress is about to begin in earnest, I thought it good to inject some season long brevity into the imminent suffering we will experience in just a few days time.
A fantastic tradition that only truly happens once a year, yet needs to be used more often is the long list of prop bets that come out for the Super Bowl. For those of you who aren't closet gambling addicts, prop (short for Proposition) bets are wagers made based on the occurrence (or non-occurrence) of a specific event during the game that does not directly affect the final outcome (Wikipedia), or an event not normally gambled upon (Urban Dictionary).
Some of my favorite Super Bowl prop bets from last year were...
- Will the coin toss be heads or tails?
- Over/Under; Time when the first touchdown is scored - 5.5 minutes
- Over/under : Jersey number of the player to score the first touchdown - 81.5
- Who will score more points, LeBron James vs. the Raptors, or the Patriots?
Borrowing from this, I would like to propose some Niners Nation Prop-Bets. I have a few season-long, and some week-to-week bets that, at the very least, will keep me slightly closer to sane. Hopefully by sharing them, you can join me in some entertainment that could either enhance a victory, or take the sting off a tough loss.
Note I do not provide the money lines (e.g. -105, +200, etc) because A) that's way above my head and too much work, B) I'm not actually putting money on these bets, you chain-smoking gambling fiend you, and C) I'm trying to set these lines either choice is more-or-less a coin toss (don't worry, you'll get that bet too).
I have ten Regular Season long prop bets:
- Number of Jim Harbaugh handshakes ending in "controversy": 0.5
- Longest TD reception for Vernon Davis: 56.5 yards
- Week the 49ers clinch a playoff spot: 14.5
- False start penalties by Joe Staley: 6
- Number of yards passing for David Akers and Andy Lee: 17
- Total team interceptions: 22.5
- Number of yards rushed for by opponents against the 49ers: 1300
- Who scores more points in a season, Vernon Davis or Frank Gore?
- Will there be more heads or tails at coin tosses?
- What is more, the number of runs scored by the winning team in Game 4 of the World Series, or the number of Colin Kaepernick pass attempts this season?
... and six Week 1 prop bets:
- Number of times FOX announcers bring up that the 49ers passed on Aaron Rogers in the draft: 3.5
- Number of televised Jim Harbaugh man-hugs: 2.5
- Number of penalties for both teams: 24
- Longest Andy Lee punt: 58 yards
- What is more, the number of Aaron Rogers passing yards, or the total yardage for the 49ers?
- What is more, the number of Packers punts, or the number of challenges used by both teams?
Note; I'm not encouraging anyone to spend their hard earned money on these ridiculous lines that I made up out of thin air. Also, I am writing this in Delaware, so I'm covered.
If there are enough emotional gambling freaks like me out there playing along, I'll keep tabs on these results and let you know weekly how people are stacking up, plus come up with some week 2 bets to put on the table for your wagering pleasure. If it's just me keeping up on it, well, I'll see you all at that dark corner of your local dive bar, drowning my sorrows in the cheapest whiskey possible before Lenny the Hand comes collecting.