Slight change of scheduled programming, Fooch's post will be up around 4 p.m. today folks. Yesterday, we took a look at our confidence levels in Patrick Willis, so today we're taking a brief look at Andy Lee. Lee, as we all know, is the best punter in the league, despite what some unsavory folks in Oakland may be trying to tell you.
The fact is that the only competition Lee has is with Shane Lechler, and even then I don't think it's really competition. That aside, I found that a majority of you folks voted in the option yesterday that resulted in Patrick Willis not killing Andy Lee, and I figured I should take a look at Lee and, since you all seem to want him alive, what our expectations are this year.
After the jump I define your 100% serious, 100% true-to-life expectations that could seriously happen given how... sexiful Andy Lee is.
Very High: Lee hits the Cowboys' video board with a punt. From Candlestick Park.
Very High: Andy adds in a point and a wink to his punting motion in which he singles out a single Gold Rush cheerleader. The motion impregnates the entire squad by the end of the year.
Very High: The 49ers offense is too dominant and Lee never gets a chance to punt, so he takes over Nedney's kicking duties and supplants Josh Morgan as the team's number two receiver with his controversial catching-with-the-feet motion.
Very High: Andy Lee will be the team's designated means for running out the clock. Instead of "pounding the rock", the team just brings out Andy Lee with ten minutes to go in the game, he punts the ball and give it ten minutes of hangtime. Lee then does the rounds and soundly defeats the entire opposing team in both "Rock, Paper, Scissors" and "Yo Momma So Fat" contests.
Very Low: As noted yesterday, Lee is killed by a tragic long snap from Patrick Willis while Brian Jennings is off doing something that involves mushrooms. Willis long snaps right through Lee's chest and he dies tragically. The punting duties are handled by Willis just as the long snapping duties are.