We've reached the final match on the left side of the bracket, which means we're halfway through the opening round. It looks like all of us childish, unmarried simpletons have pushed "NFL's Exclusive License With EA" through to the second round over "Super Bowl Halftime Shows", at least at the time of writing this post. Looks like Niners Nation needs to grow up and stop being so lonely, and some schooling of some kind wouldn't hurt, either!
So after this matchup, we'll be moving on to the second half of the bracket, with some pretty good matches lined up on the other side. But today, we have one of my favorite of the entire bracket, as "Frank Gore's Unconditional Love For Moran Norris" takes on "Cortland Finnegan Not Getting Beaten Up More Often."
We'll get to the voting in a moment, but first: remember, we are voting on what we believe to be the absolute worst thing of the two. If you're voting in a worst food contest, and you like pizza more than hamburgers, you would then vote for hamburgers in that matchup. Get it? Got it? Good. Make the jump for descriptions of the entrants, past results from previous days and a link to the bracket in its entirety.
(2) Frank Gore's Unconditional Love For Moran Norris
Well, I've been the guy who doesn't necessarily support Moran Norris as the fullback for our San Francisco 49ers, but I definitely do defend him from time to time. It's easy for us to focus all of our hate and malice in the direction of the fullback who does, admittedly, make a good deal of mistakes, but he's definitely not totally lost out there on every snap. The problem with that statement is the fact that no starter deserves to start when they're simply "not totally lost." Norris had one really good season as the lead blocker for Frank Gore, and since then, Gore has been adamant in his refusal to play behind anybody else. They're buddies, and it's getting in the way of a strong rushing attack, instead of getting in the way of defenders like Norris should be. Gore loves Norris, and I'm really unsure as to why. Since his season with the Detroit Lions, he's been a shell of his former self, and one of the worst starting fullbacks in the league. Why can't you quit him, Frank? Why?
(15) Cortland Finnegan Not Getting Beaten Up More Often
Somebody call those clowns from the Jersey Shore and tell them to pick up their friend Pauly D. Seriously, Cortland Finnegan is the biggest clown shoes in the National Football League. More than that, next to Hines Ward, he's got the stupidest face ever. Yes. His actual face is stupid. Everything about this guy makes me want to dropkick a nun or beat somebody unconscious with a sack of puppies. He's a dirty player, and you can see it in this game when the Titans took on the Texans. He gets all up in Andre Johnson's grill, and he's not trying to hear any of that jive. Johnson serves up a beating here. Isn't it just awful that it doesn't happen more often? It's an even better video because Johnson isn't known for that kind of thing at all.
Day 1: "America's Team" def. "New York FOOTBALL Giants" - 428-40
Day 2: Rookie Holdouts def. Week 16, 17 Byes - 266-65
Day 3: Seahawks Alternates def. Buccaneers Loser Uniforms - 328-118
Day 4: New Referee Rule Limiting No Huddle def. Icing The Kicker - 180-116
Day 5: Twitter Beefs def Madden Curse - 125-108
Day 6: Prevent Defense def. Wildcat Formation - 296-65
Day 7: Chris Berman's Mannerisms def. The Many Faces of Philip Rivers - 188-185
Day 8: Player 'X' Is A Football Player def. Player 'X' Is A Future Hall Of Famer - 194-96
Day 9: Brett Favre's Media Whoring def. New AFC and NFC Championship Trophies - 293-39
Day 10: Fans That Take It Too Far def Franchise Tag - 231-42
Day 11: Daniel Snyder def. Rex Ryan's Foot Fetish - 126-76
Day 12: Garth DeFelice def. Donovan McNabb And Overtime Rules - 207-48
Day 13: TV Blackouts def Player 'X' Always Being Wide Open - 253-43
Day 14: Players Celebrating When Down Big def. Being A "Poor Man's" Something - 244-35
Day 15: NFL's Exclusive License With EA versus Super Bowl Halftime Shows -