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At long last, we have new photos of 49ers performing some approximation of playing football. It's been a while. It really has. Things get desperate in the offseason. Every new week, I check for new photos, and every week I'm disappointed. The Combine offers a brief respite, but even those aren't really 49ers. Not yet. But the rest of the time, that's when the searches start. Sure, it all starts with a harmless search for cats, but then by midnight I'm typing b-r-e-t-t-f-a-v-r-e into the search bar while sweating vodka and chewing coffee grinds. If there's a better way, I haven't found it.
But we have new photos! What a frabjous day!
So here we have Jason Slowey and... uh... good old... number 6...? Good old Redshirt Six, we'll call him.
I don't know who that is. I can't find him on the roster. Maybe he just snuck in. Maybe he's Jason Slowey's friend. Whoever he is, it looks like the two of them have cooked up a killer dance routine. A possible rendition:
Slowey: "I don't wanna. The routine's not ready yet."
Six: "We're doing this, Jason. The team wants to see what we've been working on."
Slowey: "It's not ready yet!"
Six: "This is gonna be so great. Oh man, the music's starting. This is so great!"
Slowey: "I don't wanna."
Six: "So, so great. Just dance, Jason!"
Slowey: "Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh."
Six: "This is awesome!"
Now, I don't want to suggest that number six is happy to be there, but, yeah... he's pretty darned happy to be there.
Give this photo the caption it deserves. Head down to the comments section to play, and rec any comments you see that make you laugh. Last week, mrg80 got the most recs. This week, it could be you.