clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

49ers vs. Rams: The results of my investigation into St. Louis' food source

New, comments

I'm still bloated. Oh God. Help me.

Rich Schultz

Sometimes, you've got to get dirty. I've been doing deep investigations into the San Francisco 49ers' opponents each week and thus far I've been pleased with the results. But for the most part, these investigations have resulted in food that looked thoroughly appetizing and was actually on the prettier side. They can't all look that good. They can't all look like deep dish pizza, Sonoran hot dogs and Philly cheesesteaks.

Sometimes, they'll look like the Slinger.

The slinger, as I understand it, is a midwestern diner recipe. It's probably totally possible that people living in and around St. Louis have never heard of it, but when looking through St. Louis cuisine, I was finding too many things that resembled other things we've already done or plan to do this season. This was simple, and it looked somewhat intimidating. So I went for it.

Said slinger generally consists of eggs, hash browns, meat, chili, cheese and onions. I like all of those things, sans chili, but again, this series can't all hinge on my tastes, can it? I'm doing an investigation here! So we went with the slinger, and these are the results. So my fiancee, who happens to be a chef at Galletto Ristorante in Modesto, CA, set out to make it for me on Friday.

Everything below this line is her until I say otherwise.

So this week I made the midwestern diner specialty, the Slinger. I tried to stay relatively true to what the description was, as it is SO easy! I love breakfast food, chili is good, cheese makes everything better... My number one mistake was not using bacon! I plan to do it next time I make this (I may actually make it sans-chili - James enjoyed it, but I thought the chili was a little overpowering).

Typically (according to the Wikipedia article) the Slinger consists of "two eggs, hash browns, and a hamburger patty (or any other meat) all covered in chili con carne (with or without beans) and generously topped with cheese (cheddar or American) and onions."

We opted for two other kinds of meat - I used thick cut breakfast ham slices and linguica. I used regular frozen hash browns (it was an all natural brand of some sort...the least expensive in the grocery store), eggs, canned chili con carne (store brand), a monterey/colby jack shredded cheese mix and onions - I grilled the onions as I do not at all enjoy the flavor of raw onions.

Ingredients here: 
Four eggs
1 TBS of milk or water (to help smooth the eggs when you scramble them)
1 link of linguica
1/2 a yellow onion, medium dice
4 slices of breakfast ham
1 can of chili con carne (or homemade!)
Hash browns Vegetable oil (or some other neutral flavored oil to fry the hash browns in)
Shredded cheese
Salt and pepper to taste, in everything

First thing I did was heat up my griddler. Then I got a 12-inch saute pan heating with 4TBS of vegetable oil in it (This is what my hash brown bag called for - follow the instructions on yours and you'll be golden). I added 4C of hash browns (again, as per bag instructions) to the pan and just left it alone.

I cracked the eggs into a bowl and added a little water to it and whisked them. I usually add my salt and pepper before I scramble the eggs, but that's up to you. I sliced the linguica in half, peeled the casing off and cut it into wedges. I also diced the onion at this point as well. I had things in little piles on my cutting board afterwards, which is fine. Prepping everything like this beforehand usually means you won't be having bits and pieces of the meal getting cold before it's all done.

I dumped the chili into a small saucepot and heated it up, and kept it on the corner of the stove while everything else cooked. Once the griddler was hot I threw a couple pieces of ham onto it to cook, and I can pretty much ignore that for a while because my griddler doesn't get so hot things will burn if I leave it alone. I got another saute pan out and heated it up, then added the linguica to it and got a nice brown going on the sausage. Then I added the eggs to scramble and let those cook for a bit before scrambling them up. I like a nice hard cook on my scrambled eggs, complete with some browning on it. I added some cheese into it after it was pretty much cooked for added cheesy glory. Once the hash browns were browned on both sides (I'm excellent at multi-tasking when I cook ((James' note: and so modest!)), as I do it for a living... so if you have any issues with paying attention to a bunch of things at once, do cook things one at a time and keep them warm by sticking them on a plate in the microwave or oven. no need to apply heat, the enclosed space keeps them warm).

I transferred them to two plates, and threw the onions into the already hot pan to get a quick brown on them. I cooked them until they were brown and relatively soft. The ham was done at this point as well, so I put two on each plate. Once the eggs were done, I again divided them onto each plate. Then I smothered each plate in chili, sprinkled a liberal amount of cheese on top of each monstrosity, and then finished the whole thing off with the grilled onions. It was an incredibly filling meal, and I made far too much for both James and I to really eat.  Like I said, this is a really easy dish and not very technically advanced. The only "advanced" thing would be getting them all done at almost the same time so nothing got cold.

Back to James

So this isn't food that typically .. photographs well, but we do have a few pictures. The first one is to show you what's under all of this -- there's eggs, linguica (my favorite), cheese, etc:

Slinger 01

There's also grilled onions under all of this mess that you probably won't be able to see in the second picture. Here's the finished product below:

Slinger 02

The Investigation

So ... I gotta say, this was really delicious, and it went straight, straight through my system and had me slurring and sluggish after about ... two bites, tops. If the Rams players are eating anything similar to this, they're not going to be in great shape on Monday. That's all I'm saying. I'm still bloated, about three days later.