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Announcer compilation that sounds dirty, but really isn't

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Happy Saturday, everybody. It's a quiet day, and so I thought I'd put together an open thread to close out the day. I stumbled across this earlier in the week, and couldn't help but share it in an open thread. The folks at Awful Announcing saw it passing around on Twitter, and I'm here to share it further! I like to think I can be a mature adult, but once in a while things like this show up and make me crack up like I'm in middle school again.

Enjoy!