The Vox Media Product team has done some amazing things over the last decade. Whether it be re-designs of the site, the ability to edit your comments, or even the ability to post emojis in comments (now available with these emojis!), the Product team has done some great stuff.
But clearly nothing matches the greatness of this. The Product team put together an NFL Draft scouting report generator featuring various insider scouting terms, obscure shortcomings, and stupid negatives that have nothing to do with evaluating a football player.
Head over, enter your name, and click "Generate" to come up with your own scouting report. Feel free to post it in the comments as well. You can do it over and over again, entering your own name, names of draft prospects, or really just names of anybody.
Here is what I came up with initially. I'm not sure what to do about the ham theft history. Maybe I can convince teams it really isn't an issue, or at least should not be considered a character flaw!