The Niners Nation DOOM Index is having an existential crisis. Not only has the Index gained self-awareness, it is now suffering from the sad reality that it will soon come to an end — in a word, die — and I’m having trouble controlling it. The only thing I can do is get this version of the Index out there, and hope we have a solution for what to do going forward.
The San Francisco 49ers beat the Los Angeles Rams in the final game of the regular season on Sunday. It wasn’t the prettiest game, and it was against a slew of backups on the Rams roster, but the 49ers went out and won another game, and that’s enough for me. They end the season with a five-game winning streak.
That winning streak is giving just about everyone hope for the 2018 season. Jimmy Garoppolo is a stud and looks like the long-term franchise quarterback. The 49ers will franchise tag him or give him a boatload of money. Either way, the future is bright.
Things can still go wrong, of course. I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t acknowledge that. The 49ers are doomed still. They’re just approaching such low levels of doom that it’s going to be hard to measure. Our scientists aren’t able to analyze data in such small quantities. It’s a difficult process.
Once again, I’ll open up the floor to suggests for what we should call our random polls for how the 49ers are doing and where they’re headed. Someone suggested the MOOD Index, and I kind of like that name. I’m interested to hear what others think though. So stop being lazy and do my work for me, jerks.
You can find past results for the DOOM Index right here.
How doomed are the 49ers?
This poll is closed
Reuben Foster Injured Again Doomed (Most Doomed)
DeForest Buckner Injured Nooooooo Doomed (Pretty Doomed)
Carlos Hyde Fumbled Again, Drink Doomed (Somewhat Doomed)
Paying Jimmy Garoppolo Doomed (Kinda Doomed)
Jimmy Garoppolo Doomed (Least Doomed)